Ableism: What it is and How to Challenge it
When we think about equity and inclusion, disability is often left out of the conversation. Yet, people with disabilities face countless barriers every day. Not because of their disabilities, but because of ableism.
💡 What Is Ableism?
Well, here is the direct and hard truth definition: Ableism is the discrimination of and social prejudice against people with disabilities based on the belief that typical abilities are superior.
You’ve probably encountered ableism, even unintentionally, because it’s deeply embedded in our society. But awareness is the first step toward change.
🧠 Everyday Examples of Ableism
Here are some common examples of ableism you might not realize:
Assuming someone with a disability wants or needs to be “fixed”
Speaking to a person’s caregiver instead of the person directly
Praising disabled people as “inspirational” just for living their lives
Using disability as a joke or insult
These actions may seem small, but they can be deeply hurtful or isolating.
✊ How to Challenge Ableism
The good news? We can do better. Challenging ableism is about shifting mindsets, listening to disabled voices, and changing everyday practices.
Here’s how to start:
1. Educate Yourself
Read books, listen to podcasts, and follow disabled creators. Learn about different types of disabilities (physical, intellectual, developmental, sensory, and mental health) and how they impact daily life.
Suggested Reads:
Disability Visibility by Alice Wong
Demystifying Disability by Emily Ladau
2. Use Inclusive Language
Say “person with a disability” (person-first) or “disabled person” (identity-first), depending on the individual’s preference. Avoid terms like “handicapped,” “suffers from,” or “wheelchair-bound.”
💬 Pro tip: Ask people how they identify, and respect it. Some people prefer “autistic” over “person with autism”.
3. Listen to Disabled Voices
Nothing about us without us. Disabled people are the experts of their own experiences. Instead of speaking for them, amplify their voices and perspectives.
4. Check Your Spaces
Are your events, classrooms, websites, and communication methods accessible? Accessibility isn’t a luxury, it’s a right. Consider captioning videos, adding alt text to images, and offering quiet spaces or visual supports. That Tiktok you want to make, add subtitles! That subtle consideration can make that one video accessible to even more people.
5. Speak Up
If you hear ableist language or see exclusion happening, say something. Whether it’s in a meeting, a classroom, or even in your own family, silence reinforces the problem.
🌱 Final Thoughts
Challenging ableism is not about being perfect, it’s about being aware, willing to learn, and open to doing better. Disability inclusion benefits everyone by building a more accessible, compassionate world.
Let’s create spaces where everyone is seen, heard, and valued just as they are.
Want to learn more or get involved?
Explore our resources for inclusive practices, disability rights, and family support.
Understanding the IEP Process: A Parent’s Roadmap
When your child is struggling in school due to a disability, the alphabet soup of special education—IEPs, 504s, IDEA—can feel overwhelming. But don’t worry: you’re not alone, and you don’t have to figure it all out in one day.
One of the most important tools in special education is the Individualized Education Program (IEP). This roadmap is more than just paperwork—it’s a legal document designed to ensure your child receives the support they need to thrive academically and socially.
Here’s a parent-friendly breakdown of the IEP process: what it is, how it works, and how you can be a powerful advocate every step of the way.
🔍 What Is an IEP?
An Individualized Education Program is a written plan developed for students in public schools who are eligible for special education. It’s governed by the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) and includes detailed goals, accommodations, and services tailored to meet your child’s unique needs.
🛤️ Step-by-Step: The IEP Process
1. Identification and Referral
The process usually starts when a teacher or parent notices a child is struggling. You can request an evaluation in writing if you suspect your child has a disability that affects learning.
💡 Tip: Keep a record of observations and concerns. The more specific, the better.
2. Evaluation
A multidisciplinary team (including psychologists, speech therapists, and educators) assesses your child to determine if they qualify under one or more of the 13 disability categories outlined in IDEA.
This step includes cognitive, behavioral, academic, and developmental testing.
You must give written consent for the evaluation.
3. Eligibility Determination
Once the evaluation is complete, the team (including you) meets to determine whether your child is eligible for special education services.
If your child doesn’t qualify, they may still be eligible for accommodations under Section 504.
4. Writing the IEP
If your child qualifies, an IEP team—including you—convenes to draft the plan. The IEP must include:
Current performance levels
Measurable annual goals
Accommodations and modifications
Special education services
Placement information (where services will be provided)
Progress monitoring methods
💬 Parents are equal members of the IEP team. Don’t be afraid to speak up or ask for clarification.
5. IEP Meeting and Consent
You’ll review and approve the IEP during the official meeting. Once you sign off, the school must implement the plan immediately and provide services as outlined.
6. Implementation
Teachers and staff responsible for your child’s education are given access to the IEP. They are legally required to follow the plan and make the accommodations outlined.
7. Annual Review and Reevaluation
The IEP is reviewed at least once a year, but you can request a meeting at any time if something isn’t working. A full reevaluation happens at least every three years to determine if services are still needed.
🛠️ Tools and Tips for Parents
Organize your records: Keep a binder with evaluations, progress reports, and meeting notes.
Ask for drafts: Request a draft IEP before the meeting so you have time to review.
Bring support: You can invite an advocate, therapist, or friend to attend the IEP meeting with you.
Follow up: If services aren’t being provided as outlined, contact the special education coordinator or file a formal complaint if needed.
❤️ Final Thoughts
The IEP process can be daunting, especially at the beginning. But remember: you are the expert on your child. Your insights, observations, and advocacy are not only welcome—they are vital.
With knowledge, preparation, and partnership, you can help shape an educational path that empowers your child to succeed.
Need More Help?
Check out these resources:
Blog Post #1: Navigating the Unknown
It all begins with an idea.
I was pretty confident that Navigating the Unknown would be the first topic I would write about. Partly because of the current state of equity and inclusion in the U.S., and partly because the unknowns that parents, caregivers, and people with disabilities face can feel unbearably heavy.
The anxiety and worry about what’s next—whether a week from now or ten years down the line—never really go away. As a parent of a child with autism, I thought the best way to manage was to take it day by day. And in some ways, that helps. But it doesn’t erase the anxiety. It doesn’t silence the questions.
You’ll hear people say, “Focus on what you can control.” And while there’s truth in that, it also risks shutting down the foresight that allows us to plan, to prepare, to protect. Nearly everything in life is out of our control—but when you’re a parent of a child with a disability, that anxiety exists on a deep level. The questions never stop.
But here's what I’ve learned: the unknowns don’t mean you're lost. They mean you're learning to navigate differently.
Grieving What You Expected
Before I could embrace the path we were on, I had to grieve the one I thought we were on. That’s a process people don’t often talk about. It’s not about loving your child any less. It’s about releasing the dream you once had and making space for a new one—one just as valuable, just as full of joy, even if it looks different from what you imagined.
Learning to Live in the Moment
Special needs parenting teaches you to be present in a way nothing else does. Sometimes the future feels overwhelming, and the what-ifs pile up faster than you can push them away. But then your child does something they couldn’t do yesterday—a word, a step, a smile—and suddenly, that moment is everything. We celebrate differently. And maybe, we love deeper because of it.
Finding Strength in Community
One of the most powerful tools I’ve discovered is the strength that comes from other parents walking similar paths. Whether it’s through online groups, support networks, or the silent nod of understanding from a stranger in a therapy waiting room, these connections remind me: I’m not alone. I hope this can become that space to connect and build a community.
Becoming an Advocate—Even When You’re Tired
As parents of children with special needs, we become warriors. We fight for services, for inclusion, for understanding. It’s exhausting. It’s relentless. But it’s also purposeful. Advocacy becomes not just a task, but a form of love. One that says: I see my child’s worth, and I won’t let the world look away.
Embracing the Unknown
The truth is, every parent faces uncertainty. But for us, the stakes often feel higher. The path less clear. And still—we go on. We learn. We adapt. We grow.
Facing the unknown doesn’t mean we have all the answers. It means we show up anyway. With love. With hope. With courage.
And somehow, that becomes enough.